Bamboccioni..They're not just in Italy

Working in international education in Rome allows me to have a critical distance for many things State-side. I work with and for college students. I love it- helping students make their study abroad dream become a reality nella Città Eterna. I enjoy being a part of the first semester of the rest of their lives: the amazing semester abroad that opens them up to a whole world of otherness, adventure and internationality.

However, it didn't really hit me until this year that they might be fleeing someone: their parents! I have to say that in all my 15 years of experience in international education, I have never felt such a protective parent alliance out there- yes, in the United States not Italy! We all know that the average Italian lives at home until way past their 30th birthday. Known as 'bamboccioni', these Italian youth are basically socially restricted: since they cannot find jobs, they remain at home with the p's until they can find a way to successfully contribute to society. They are protected and supported until the right moment comes along for them to fly the coop.

In the US, it is a totally different scenario- or at least it used to be. Nowadays, whether it is the crisis or whatever- there seems to be a trend in parenting where US 'bamboccioni' are becoming quite common. Not able to find jobs immediately after college due to the bleak state of the economy, many college grads have been forced to flock back home to mom and dad.

And these parents are quite protective of their fledglings being out there in the world alone- in Rome! Many of these helicopter parents are fending for their kids even if they are well beyond the age of 18! Don't get me wrong. I think it is great that these parents are involved in their son or daughter's life, but not to the point of filling out their application or sending emails on their behalf!! This subliminally strange need to live vicariously through their son or daughter is a bit unsettling. And, needless to say, impedes that individual to face life on her own.

Italian 'bamboccioni' are of course unique: high unemployment forces many of them into their state of eternal teenager. However, I do acknowledge that the US version is quite different and even more debilitating since it is pertpetuated by a parental need for control.

But does this control help or hinder? Familial support is necessary and I believe that is what compensates for the void in Italian public society. However, when does a parent let go?